The Day You Realize You Deserve Better

There’s a moment, quiet but seismic, when you stop making excuses for “almost enough.” It’s not a dramatic movie scene. No storm, no big speech. Just you, sitting with the truth: You’ve been settling.

Settling for love that barely reciprocates. For friendships that take but never give. For jobs that drain you more than they develop you. For a version of yourself that you’ve outgrown. That’s the day it clicks, you deserve better.

1. You Deserve More Than Breadcrumbs

Have you ever noticed how people will give you just enough to keep you hopeful? A text here. A compliment there. A raise that looks generous on paper but doesn’t match your worth. It’s called breadcrumbing, and it’s not just a dating term. It happens in careers, families, and friendships too.

We keep chasing the crumbs because we think, “If I just try harder, maybe they’ll finally see my value.” But here’s the truth: trying harder won’t make someone or something see you more clearly. A 2023 Gallup poll found that nearly 60% of employees feel emotionally detached from their work. That’s not laziness; that’s the human cost of staying where you’re unseen.

2. The Shift: From Detachment to Alignment

There’s a quiet transformation that happens when you decide you’re done settling. It’s not bitterness; it’s clarity. You stop chasing closure from people who already showed you who they are. You stop reacting to every trigger. You stop performing for approval that never comes.

It’s not that you don’t care anymore. It’s that you finally do about you. When you align with your worth, peace becomes your new baseline. And let’s be real, peace is expensive—that’s why so many avoid buying it.

3. Compassion Isn’t Slavery

This one’s tough. Many of us stay stuck out of compassion. We understand someone’s pain, their trauma, their situation. We tell ourselves, “They just need time.” Or “They don’t mean to hurt me.” But understanding someone doesn’t mean you have to stay in the fire with them.

You can love people deeply and still choose yourself. You can wish them healing and still walk away. As Joshua Rosa says in Made For This Mountain,

“Sometimes we make our sympathy our slavery.”

Freedom starts when you stop confusing compassion with captivity.

4. Rewriting Your Standards

When you start believing you deserve better, everything changes—not just your relationships, but your routines, your goals, even your self-talk. You start editing your life like an author who finally sees the plot holes.

✅ You raise your boundaries.

✅ You stop negotiating your peace.

✅ You start giving yourself the same energy you give everyone else.

It’s not arrogance. It’s awareness.

5. The Freedom in Letting Go

Letting go doesn’t mean you lost. It means you learned. It’s the moment you stop auditioning for roles you were never meant to play—employee, friend, partner, fixer. Fear keeps us in small rooms. But every version of you that’s waiting to emerge needs space, and that space only opens when you stop settling for scraps.

When you finally let go, you don’t just get freedom; you get yourself back.

6. “Deserve Better” Isn’t Just About Love

This realization hits every corner of your life.

• At work: Stop confusing loyalty with obligation.

• In friendships: Stop overexplaining your boundaries.

• In your own head: Stop believing you need to earn rest or peace.

  
  

You don’t have to prove your worth. You just have to protect it.

7. Embracing Your Journey

Recognizing your worth is a journey. It’s not a one-time event; it’s a continuous process. Each step you take towards self-improvement is a step towards a more fulfilling life. Celebrate your small victories! They matter.

Surround yourself with people who uplift you. Join communities that encourage growth. Seek out resources that inspire you. Remember, you are not alone in this journey.

8. Practical Steps to Start Today

Feeling inspired? Here are some practical steps to help you begin this transformative journey:

1. Journal Your Thoughts: Write down what you deserve in life. Reflect on your feelings and experiences.

2. Set Clear Boundaries: Identify areas in your life where you need to establish boundaries. Communicate them clearly.

3. Practice Self-Care: Dedicate time to activities that nourish your mind and body. You deserve it!

4. Seek Support: Don’t hesitate to reach out to friends, family, or professionals who can support your journey.

   
   

🎙️ Listen: The Day You Realize You Deserve Better — EP 26, Made For This Mountain Podcast

Hosted by Joshua Rosa on iHeartRadio + My Cultura Podcast Network. This episode dives deep into how to recognize the signs you’ve been settling and how to start aligning with your true worth—in relationships, work, and life.

“You deserve more than breadcrumbs that keep you satisfied but never fed.”

🎧 Listen now: Made For This Mountain — available wherever you stream podcasts.

Embrace this journey of self-discovery. You deserve every bit of happiness and fulfillment that life has to offer!